“Oh God, this is terribly embarrassing,” I sheepishly admitted to the clinic nurse on the phone. I had urgently called my family doctor to discuss a recent pinky finger injury. Calling my family doctor is a three-step process usually; the receptionist will have a nurse call me back to assess the situation, after which I may or may not need to speak to my doctor. Well, the nurse had called me back and I was hoping we could just go straight into booking an x-ray without going into CSI-detail about how I may have sustained said injury.
After some triaging, we determined that my pinky finger was likely not deformed, broken, swollen, immobile, discoloured or in a ton of pain- THANK GOD. “All good, very good signs,” she said. By this time, I was only suffering very mild numbness and on a scale of one to ten (ten being I’m dying of sheer pain and will kill my husband shortly), I told her I was probably a one (if that), and only when I made a fist with that particular hand.
Then the inevitable question came up, “so, how did you injure your finger?”
I said a little prayer at this point and pleaded with the Gods to let this nurse see the humour in it all. “Um… I was *ahem* roughhousing with my husband last night, actually. *long pause* We, ah, we might have had a pillow fight?” As if I wasn’t exactly sure this had occurred: am I really a grown woman calling my doctor’s office about an injury due to child’s play with my husband? Is this my life? Did I just say those words? Her reaction, bless her heart, was one of amused empathy for a comical situation gone wrong. “So, how exactly did this happen?”
“Well, ugh, it all started when we decided to retire for the night. I asked my husband to help me bring up my water bottle but he ignored my request and bolted up the stairs without me. Then, of course, I gave chase and that’s when the pillow fight ensued.”
*Silence*
“Oh, kay…that’s great but I meant the injury, how do you think you injured it?”
“Oh yes, the injury! Sorry *nervous laughter*, you see, I tried as hard as I could to whip my husband in the face with a pillow but he put his stupid manly arms up in a defensive stance and I may have bent my finger the wrong way while trying to demolish his face?” Indeed, I remember the moment rather vividly. In that instant, I imagined I was Mark Wahlberg in the movie, The Fighter (except I’m female, a bit of a wuss and truth be told, I’m more of a crier than a fighter). Anyway, I was the hero underdog and my husband, the nemesis. My sole goal was to utterly destroy him and make him pay… you know, for bolting and not helping me with my water bottle. In real life, though, we probably looked like a couple of preteens at a sleepover haphazardly ducking and flinging our expensive down-filled pillows at each other while whisper-screaming (so as not to wake the baby), “no you stop, no YOU stop!”
Okay- I never gave the nurse all the details but if she were to distinctly ask me for the play-by-play of how and why this happened, that would be my answer.
My doctor eventually called me back the next day and the first words she uttered after the usual pleasantries were, “so, I heard about the infamous pillow fight.” I could hear her smiling over the phone despite herself and my cheeks began to flush thinking, I’m going to freakin’ kill him when I get home! After we laughed it off, she determined that I likely just strained a muscle in my pinky finger. She told me to call back in a week if it didn’t feel any better but she expected it would fully heal by then and wished me luck with the next pillow fight. What are the chances this wasn’t the water cooler story of the day in her office?!
What can I say… It’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt, then it’s Game Over!
Hahahah! Reminds me of the FRIENDS episodes in which Joey hurts his hand while jumping on the bed and Chandler tells the doctor on him. 😂
As a woman in India, you are bound to have an awkward conversation or two with the “oh-so-judgemental” gynae. 😂🙈
But having pillow fights with the hubby – sounds like so much fun! 😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha yes I remember that episode LOL
LikeLike
This puts a spin on pillow talk.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha it sure does! Lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hilarious, as usual. It makes me think of all of the stupid stuff I’ve done and managed to hurt myself in the process. By bringing our situations (some serious enough to require medical attention) to a doctor’s attention, we open ourselves to further humiliation.🤣 Is that a consequence we are willing to endure? This is one of the things I like best about blogging. Bloggers write about something that triggers our own memories. I think this may be worthy of a blog post in a couple of weeks. Of course, I’ll link it back to here.
Spontaneous moments like pillow fights with your spouse are the little things so important in a marriage. Is there any truth to the rumor that you are setting up a pay-per-view rematch? I’ll promote the hell out of it. 😉 This is probably way before you and your husband’s time, but this reminds me of Don King, who went to prison for manslaughter but still managed to become rich and famous by attaching himself to other rich people. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don_King_(boxing_promoter)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha can’t wait to read about it on your blog! Always happy for the promo! 🙂 At the moment I must say I was quite agitated and annoyed, fearful our playful fight could potentially land me in the ER and expose me to covid but looking back it’s always humorous! Lol Will check out that link, thanks 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is a amazing, and definitely the water cooler story of the day! There is so much childish roughhousing in our house…I’m surprised no on has gotten hurt yet. Though, I guess there have been “accidents,” like the time I dropped the dumper lid on my boyfriend (resulting in a black eye and bloody nose) or the time he found the broken bit of a plastic appliance in his meal. Opps!
LikeLiked by 1 person
LOL plastic appliance sounds very purposeful, not accidental at all LOL just kidding! Sometimes we gotta let out some steam, right? Lol why not!
LikeLike
God bless you and your husband!! This is exactly what I want to find in a soul mate!! Wild pillow shenanigans and other feathery tomfoolery!! I’m a bit envious of you, but happy for you all the same!! 😀 But yes, I do believe that you should take the upper hand here and instill some bedroom justice, because this is all his fault. [Snort.] I’m sure no one would disagree with me. He needs to be put in his place posthaste! Maybe you could graduate to sofa cushions? 😛
LikeLiked by 1 person
HAHA sofa cushions! My mom used to chase me around with a slipper so I guess we all know where I get it from! Don’t be envious, it’s not always fun and games but I appreciate the thought 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Roughhousing is my favourite pastime! I am totally gonna throw a pillow at Mr Big and see what happens…bonus if it results in a few days off work 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha can’t wait to hear about it lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaha, oh girl, that is a fantastic story…one you will be sure to be laughing about for years to come!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha I sure hope so… Funny story, yesterday we were at it again and he bumped his nose into my knee and got a bloody nose…. Lol you know what they call that? KARMA! LOL
LikeLike
Also (I realize now), others might call it domestic “altercations” but I can assure everyone he and I are unintentionally abusive to each other, promise! LOL
LikeLike
HAHA! Sounds like something my husband and I would do. This is hilarious – but I’m glad your pinky is going to be okay! 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yea I lived LOL I got him back the night after anyway! Lol
LikeLike
I love this so much, sorry for your pinky but thank you for sharing this hilarious story! Omg the Dr mentioning it when calling you back lol I would’ve died hahahaha!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes I was so embarrassed lol could hardly get the words out… Lol I thought about lying but I always feel with doctors if I don’t give the exact details what if they miss something and bc of that I don’t get the care I need and then somehow I die LOL
LikeLiked by 1 person
Pingback: The Best Medicine – Pete Springer
I’m here from Happy Panda’s blog 🙂 She was right, you are hilarious!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Haha aw thanks! I will be sure to give her a big thank you for the suggestion!! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
So HAPPY PANDA sent me here, and she is right you are hilarious!!!!
Ps- I think you are gonna one of the blogsites whom I gonna binge read 😉😉
And it may sprain my fingers, liking and commenting on your posts 😂😂😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hahaha that’s the biggest compliment thank you so much! 🙂 thx for taking the time! ♥️😄
LikeLiked by 1 person